Burnout. It´s a word we hear a lot now but what actually is it, and how do we know if we are at risk of it?
The phenomenon of burnout has emerged as an issue affecting individuals across various professions, but as Harriet Griffey, a writer well-versed in wellness and productivity, aptly puts it, “Burnout typically affects those of us trying to be all things to all people.” As Executive Assistants, trying to be all things to all people is almost part of the job description.
But what is burnout exactly? It´s far beyond the realms of being a bit tired, or having had a difficult or busy week. Once you hit the point of burnout, you´re well past being able to recover with a quiet evening in. Burnout represents a deeper, more chronic state of mental, emotional, and physical exhaustion. It's a culmination of prolonged stress and overcommitment, where you find yourself trapped in a cycle of relentless striving with little respite or appreciation.
Imagine running a marathon, except at the end of it, instead of being able to rest and recover before you start again, you just keep going. Now I know that there are people that can run a daily marathon, even dozens of them, but eventually, they all have to stop. Their body demands it. We wouldn´t dream of expecting our bodies to be able to maintain that level of work (at least I definitely wouldn´t - I genuinely consider how much I need something before I even go up the stairs), so why do we expect our minds to?
Although mental health is something that is much more openly discussed, for many, there is still a stigma attached to admitting that you may be struggling. The feeling still often prevails that needing a break is somehow a sign of weakness, or laziness, or both. Logically we may know it´s ridiculous, and if we had broken a leg we wouldn´t walk on it to prove we´re tough, but the difficult truth is that we´re almost hard wired to keep going when it comes to mental struggles. Unfortunately, it´s often this reluctance to take the right break that can lead to chronic burnout and no amount of scented candles are going to get you out of that.
So what do we do if we feel we´re approaching burnout, or even if we´re already there?
I´ve been fortunate enough to listen to quite a few mental health coaches in my career and whilst their advice is undoubtedly right, it always felt completely unattainable. One of the more consistent pieces of wisdom that is bandied about is to make yourself a priority. Now that sounds good in principle, but it completely ignores the reality of many peoples situations. I specifically was given this advice when I was trying to cope with working two jobs, looking after two children and caring for a terminally ill parent. During Covid. Now the advice was well meaning but utterly ridiculous. I couldn´t simply not work, I couldn´t simply step away from my children, and I couldn´t just not care for my parent. It felt like taking a mental health break was a luxury reserved for the wealthy that could outsource their responsibilities.
So what can you do (assuming you´re not able to pay your bills with good vibes) if you do know that you need to get yourself to a better place and take some of the pressure off?
Well, maybe you can´t afford a housekeeper, but is there any part of your work that you can let go of? And be honest with yourself. I know as much as anyone how difficult it can be to let someone else do a job you usually do, especially if you feel like they aren´t doing it as well as you would.
Just yesterday, I sat through the frankly arduous task of watching my son wash the dishes. It took him, and I am not exaggerating one iota here, a full hour to wash eight dishes and one pan. Yes, it was difficult (I never thought watching someone else do work could feel physically painful) but the fact is it got done, and I didn´t have to do it.
So maybe you make a list of everything you do at work, and at home, and figure out which of those things you can delegate. I´m not talking about passing over every job you have to someone else. I´m suggesting that maybe it doesn´t have to be you that does all of them. As Executive Assistants, it´s built in your DNA to say yes, but saying yes to everything leaves you with no room to concentrate fully on anything. You will simply exhaust yourself with seemingly never ending tasks. We wouldn´t hesitate to say no if someone asked us to take on a job that meant an additional 20 hours of work every week, and yet we´re happy to take on 60 additional “little” tasks that take the same amount of time.
So if you´re feeling like you´ve got too much on your plate, take a step back, and begin to delegate. If you can´t breathe, you can´t function, and no one wins any medals for making the most sacrifices. Work smarter, not harder. Say no to jobs that can be done by others, buy the cake already made. You may not be able to book yourself a spa weekend to get away from your stress, but you can stop adding to it. And maybe take a bath and read a few pages of the book that´s been sitting on the shelf forever with that spare hour you´ve found yourself.
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